The Negotiation Guru

Recently, I went to a consulting workshop conducted by Wharton school. One of the speakers from a prestigious consulting company said “I always take notes during meetings.” The audience laughed. He went on to explain why note-taking is important. This is the same for negotiations.

Note-taking gives you clarity. When you physically write down the key points during negotiations, you will be able to reflect on some of the important points that your target has revealed. In a negotiation, both parties usually have more than one interest. Listing out clearly on your notepad the interests that your target has can be used as a tool as well. You can go on and say “Let me see if I understand you correctly. You wanted a good price, after-sales service, technical support, quality products and speed-to-market.” Your target will appreciate that you are clear with what he wants. From there, you have a clear idea of his wants and can go on to work on how to negotiate a win-win deal.

This can also be used to prevent the other party from going back on their words. This is a consistency tool to be used so to keep your target committed. Very often, you find the other party changing his mind after a few days. The negotiation has to go back to square one because his interests are now totally different from what was initially discussed. To prevent this, you can use your notes as a consistency tool.

“I have it written that you mentioned in the last meeting that you wanted a good price, after-sales service… Is that still right?”

If you want to appear slightly more aggressive, you can add that:

“I believe that we can have a good deal. If your interests are unclear and change from day-to-day, I am afraid we won’t have a mutually beneficial outcome. Let me know after you have discussed with your team, we will resume negotiation then.”

This is a powerful tool. People are afraid of appearing inconsistent. The consistency principle works on everyone. I will elaborate on the consistency principle in my future posts.

Remember to take notes when you negotiate.

My team arranged to have a meeting at the lobby. In order to enter the building, we had to scan our identity card. I rushed to leave my apartment and left my card at home. I was refused entry by the security card. I explained my situation, and she referred me to the front desk to get approval.

At the front desk was a lady in her late thirties. She was busy sorting out a stack of documents.

“Hi, I’ve forgotten to bring my card. Is there a way I can get into the building? I have an important meeting to attend.”

She shook her head in a really dramatic manner and said “No, I can’t help you.”

I began to think of alternatives. I didn’t bring my phone so I was not able to drop my friends a call.

“How about this, I will leave my laptop with you. Let me into the building and I will get my friend out to sign me in.”

“No, you can’t do that. I will not let you in no matter what. This is the rule of the building.”

“Yes, I understand that it’s the rule of the building. I really have a very important meeting and I’m late …Can you make an exception just for this time round?”

“No.” She was really firm.

So I asked her “If you were me, what would you have done?”

“I will go back home and get my card. This is the rule. No one can change the rule. Sorry, I can’t let you in”

“What if YOU live an hour away?” I pursued.

-Pause-

She knew that I was not going to go away and I was really persistent.

“I didn’t mean to be nasty but I really can’t do that,” she said in an apologetic manner. This was my chance.

I kept quiet and looked at her. She became really uncomfortable with the silence and avoided eye contact with me. Finally, she succumbed.

“Alright, I will make an exception this time just for you. I will sign you in with my own card.”

Bingo!

Can you identify the tools I used?

There are some people who resist giving information. You might ask “how do I discover interest if the other party resist giving information?” Simple, learn to deal with them.

You:     “How did you come up with this decision?”

Target:  “Because I want it to.”

You:     “Is it because you wanted….and….” (you begin to hypothesize)

Target:  “Oh please…*roll eyes*…give me a break. I just wanted it this way. Period.”

What can you do? 1) Get them to talk about their decision.Ask them about their decision again.“I didn’t quite get your decision. Can you say it again, please?”

More often than not, they will restate their decision, use other verbs and elaborate on their decision. When they start elaborating, do nothing but listen! This is your golden opportunity to find out their underlying interests. You can carry on asking for clarifications on the terms and details. 2) Locate the “voice” behindYou will be surprised that sometimes the people you negotiate with are just puppets of the main decision makers.An experienced negotiator once said “The worst person to negotiate for the President is the President himself.” The decision makers often get people to negotiate on their behalf.

You can question your target : “Who says it has to be done this way? Can I talk to that person?” Always locate the “president” in your negotiations.

3) Magical use of silence (this can be a powerful tool)Target:  “I am not going to pay for your service.”

You:     “You are not going to pay for my service.”

-Pause-

-Pause-

-Pause-

Target: “Yes, because you have terrible service. You guys are always late. The job is badly done. I don’t like this part of the job done…etc”

Many people dislike the awkward silence in conversations. They will do anything to fill up the silence. When they desperately try to find something to fill up the gap, they will elaborate on their decision. When they elaborate, they are revealing more information and you continue to probe again.