The Negotiation Guru

“Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language” – Dale CarnegieOn my way to work this morning, I was having a heated discussion with my colleague who was sitting at the front seat (I was the driver). We were discussing a project we are working on currently. Another colleague decided that he was not interested in the discussion, put on his ipod and fell asleep.

Suddenly, at the mere mention of his name, he woke up (perhaps he was eavesdropping). But this shows how important a person’s name is to him. You can wake a dead from his sleep just by calling his name. No one cares about other people’s name more than his own. We are only tuned to what we want to hear.

This is the magic contained in a name. During negotiations, we have to be respectful to the party we are negotiating with. Learn to remember the names of the party you are negotiating with. Addressing the other party by his last name can be a way to show respect. Addressing him by his first name can breed familiarity. It all depends on the type of negotiation you are in. During a transactional negotiation such as negotiating with a salesperson, I always make it a point to ask for his name and use his name frequently throughout the entire negotiation. All of a sudden, we became good friends and the success rate of the negotiation increased tremendously.

Andrew Carnegie, one of the greatest negotiators ever walked on this earth, had the policy of remembering and honoring names of his business associates. Why shouldn’t you do the same?