The Negotiation Guru

“You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.”
- Harriet Woods

The best way to win and win BIG at a negotiation? Get to a win-win situation.

The main objective of a win-win negotiation is to be able to help the other party get what they want. Here, I am not advocating that you should sacrifice to help them get what they want. Find a solution that is best for both parties. Make them leave the negotiating table feeling that they have won.

The term “win-win” has been abused many times over. You can even negotiate on what a “win-win” solution is. Ideally, you want the other party to feel that it’s a win-win solution as well. It has to be mutual. If you are alone in believing that it’s an ideal win-win situation, you can’t be further from the truth.

So, how can we arrive at a true win-win situation?

Rule #1: Never assume there’s only 1 issue

One of the biggest trap in most negotiation is to think that price is the only issue. People spend a large amount of time negotiating “the price”. Price is only one of the many issues. It is not the only issue, and should never be.

There are always more issues in any negotiation. We just don’t see the other issues. We shelved ourselves into believing that if we can get a good price, we win. It’s fascinating to study how some of such negotiations and observe the many mistakes.

Study the elements that contribute to the problem and eventually, the solution. Narrowing down to only one issue makes people believe that there can only be one winner. The truth is, there can be more than just one winner. Negotiation is not a race or a competition per se.

Avoid nailing down other elements that can contribute to a solution. Piece together all these elements like a Jigsaw puzzle. The final picture should be that both parties leave the negotiating table feeling they have won.

There are always other elements that are important to people.

Rule #2: Everyone is right

Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world.
-Arthur Schopenhauer

Everyone has their own unique perspectives. If we always assume that what the other party wants is what we want, we will never get to a win-win situation.

Different people can view the same thing but have different perspectives on it. If we are able to understand the fact that people have different perspectives, the world will be a so much better place. More than half the problems our world is facing will disappear immediately only if we understand that there’s no right or wrong. It is just that we all see things differently. Different opinions.

We suffer from the deadly assumption that if one is right, the other has to be wrong. It is not the case of one being right or one being wrong, they are just seeing things in a different way, from a different perspective. This can diffuse a lot of conflicts in our world today.

The same applies when you are negotiating. Respect the other party’s perspective. Do not attempt to force your own perspective onto them. Never assume that what’s important to us, will be important to them as well. That’s totally not true.

Rule #3: Everyone can win

One barrier to winning big at negotiations: We make the assumption that if we help the other party get what they want, it will take away what we want.

We will never be a win-win negotiator if we think that way. People do not always want what we want. Understand that we do not necessarily want the same thing.

Get around to the other side of the negotiation table and figure how can you help him get what he wants. Find out if you can do things for them that will not take you away from your position. The best way to do this, is to find something which you can give away for free but of huge value to them.

When you are able to starting thinking about what they need, you stop thinking that you will lose out. You become more concerned with their problem. Find ways to help them get what they want. You can really win BIG in this.

Conclusion

Good negotiating is not about getting what you want. It is a matter of concern about the other party getting what they want. We do not necessary want the same thing and there are many elements to a good solution. Be creative and be open . That’s the key to arrive at a win-win solution.

Bonus video of the day: Negotiation Tips for Yahoo

Thanks to Diane Levin and Colin Rule!

—————–
Jens Thang
Negotiation Skills for Everyone

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Email: jens@thenegotiationguru.com

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This entry was posted on Friday, February 8th, 2008 at 10:52 am and is filed under Business Negotiation, Contract Negotiation, Credit Card Negotiation, Cultural Negotiation, Debt Negotiation, Others, Salary Negotiation, Sales Negotiation, Tactics. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.