The Negotiation Guru

Image by: Muha

Here are articles, blog posts and books to check out for the weekend!

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The single biggest danger in negotiation is not failure but to be successful without knowing why you are successful. -Jens Thang

In negotiation, you have to persuade. It can improve your negotiation results. Persuasion is something everyone has to do. There is no secret formula on how to persuade more effectively. It depends on which persuasion principles that you apply.

The 6 principles of persuasion by Robert Cialdini is not rocket science at all. This post will provide an overview of the 6 principles of persuasion which you can use immediately in your next negotiation. These 6 principles are there to guide you and not rules to live by.

Look at them as guidelines which can open up more options for you when you negotiate.

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My best buddy, Eric Chen, has compiled a list of negotiation quotes. Thought it might be interesting to some of you readers. You might even find some of the quotes amusing!

Here it is:

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“With great power comes great responsibility”
- adapted from Spiderman II

Power is a way to get from one place to another. It enables you to achieve what you want. You feel powerful when you are able to control the other party. Power is not a bad thing. It’s the abuse of power that makes it bad.

Power gives you the ability to influence other people. There is absolutely nothing wrong with using power. We all have power and have used power in one way or another (though you might not have noticed).

Power is dynamic and neutral. It is based not on logic but on perceptions. When the other party feels that you have power over them, it simply means that they perceive you have the ability to help them or hurt them.

Here are the 8 elements of power:

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“You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victims.”
- Harriet Woods

The best way to win and win BIG at a negotiation? Get to a win-win situation.

The main objective of a win-win negotiation is to be able to help the other party get what they want. Here, I am not advocating that you should sacrifice to help them get what they want. Find a solution that is best for both parties. Make them leave the negotiating table feeling that they have won.

The term “win-win” has been abused many times over. You can even negotiate on what a “win-win” solution is. Ideally, you want the other party to feel that it’s a win-win solution as well. It has to be mutual. If you are alone in believing that it’s an ideal win-win situation, you can’t be further from the truth.

So, how can we arrive at a true win-win situation?

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“I don’t even call it violence when it’s in self defense; I call it intelligence.”
- Malcolm X

Experienced negotiators know hundreds of tactics and strategies. However, when under pressure they will instinctly do whatever that works. In a real world negotiation situation, unethical tactics are very common. These tactics come in all direction and you won’t have time to think.

The skilled negotiator is able to deal with unethical tactics quickly with high level of control. With dedication and consistency, we can slowly learn how to deal with unethical tactics.

Here are 5 ways to deal with unethical tactics:

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“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”
- Aristotle

Many negotiation gurus are so successful in their negotiations because of the key habits that they develop over a long period of time. I spent most of my week reading and researching into the key habits of great negotiators. Some of them have a few recurring key habits.

Your goal is to become a negotiation guru. Learn the habits from the great negotiators. Apply them into your life and see how the habits will work for you. Keep experimenting with them.

These are the 4 key habits that they have:

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